In an awakened world, emotional healing is an everyday necessity. It is not something that is reserved for a once a week therapist visit for people with traumas and weird childhoods. It is not just a thing we have to do after having lived through disaster, loss or divorce. As part of our awakening process, we must get to know our emotions deeply. It is a part of self-mastery.
Most of us harbor repressed emotions from our earlier years that need to be acknowledged, felt and accepted. Especially traumatic childhood events may have been stuffed down so far that we quite frankly rather die than feel that pain again. And yet we cannot be whole and proceed with our awakening if we don’t allow ourselves to include all parts of ourselves – the good, the bad and the ugly….
So many people, who began their awakening journey with pure intent and certainty of purpose, plateaued in their process and made themselves believe that awakening is only about love and light, not realizing that they are trying with all their might to avoid the depth of their pain. When this happens, we live life cut off from our inherent divine power, and use concepts, control and external focus as a substitute for authenticity and truly being alive.
Emotional awareness comes about when we take time every day to allow ourselves to feel and to process what is going on in our body, mind, heart and spirit. Where is the inner child at? What does he or she want and need? Are we setting appropriate boundaries with ourselves and others? Where have we gone over ourselves? Where have we acted inappropriately with others? Where have we allowed others to use us as a doormat or didn’t say what we needed to say? The importance lies in getting in touch with ourselves and existing within what we are feeling. It may be best to start with a designated time that you set aside, for example morning and evening, but eventually and with practice, this emotional awareness of the self becomes a constant process. We are able to “trim as we sow” and not let emotions build up and create blocks. We learn to be real and dismantle the masks that we have been hiding behind. We stop trying to prove to the world how happy and together we are, or how victimized and unfairly treated. We are able, a little more at a time, to take responsibility for our feelings, thoughts and actions.
As we get to know ourselves on a deeper level and allow expression of all aspects of the self, we find that there is more breath in our lives, more depth to our experience. With practice, we are able to react less and less when triggered and we develop choices. We are able to see people and situations for what they are, rather than seeing our own past in everything and everyone.
As you are reading this, take a moment of present awareness. Are you breathing? What are you feeling? What’s behind that on at a deeper level? Are you feeling physically, mentally and emotionally comfortable? Are your teeth gritted and your stomach tight, or do you feel safe and relaxed? What is it that you need to feel? What part of the self is crying for attention and care, and why? This is good daily practice when coming from kindness and compassion with ourselves. It is important, as we allow ourselves to be in touch with our emotions, to also keep judgments of ourselves and negative self-talk in check.
All emotions are valid. There is a reason for all of them, even if we don’t see it right away. Our emotional reactions to people and situations are much more in touch with our intuition than our thinking minds. Trust yourself. Be gentle with yourself as you discover these pieces of yourself and integrate them into who you truly are. This is a part of living an authentic awakened life.
Neha